Possible placement #3

The one I missed out on.

I would have taken the children but my childminding work meant I couldn't. The children were aged 3 and 1. I look after two children aged 3 and 2 and am at my limit for children aged under 5. I have thought A LOT about these children and wished I could have said yes.

The day of the referral I ended up speaking to the manager of the fostering agency and she didn't sound too pleased with me. She told me I had to choose which was more important, fostering or childminding. I was a little defensive to start with. But then I realised she was right.

I had begun childminding to earn some money whilst I was waiting to start fostering. It's just having the relationship with, and committment to, my mindees and their parents changed things slightly. It's not something you can stop suddenly without upsetting people and feeling guilty. However, fostering is what I wanted to do first, and there was a reason for that. The children I mind have good, loving families. They'll be fine if they have to move to another childminder. I want to make a real difference to children's lives, for children who can't live with their birth parents.

So today I've written letters to the parents of my minded children, giving them notice to terminate their contracts. I know it's not going to please them but it's something I have to do. And in 4 weeks time I'll be free to accept any emergency placement that the agency send my way.

Possible placement #2

I had a call from my agency last week... they'd had a referral from a local authority and were looking to place two children - siblings, one aged 3 years, the other 10 months. They wanted to check I would accept the placement. I said yes despite the fact I am in the middle of packing to move!

I then had a call back a few hours later saying the children had been placed with LA carers and I wouldn't be needed after all. I was disappointed and relieved at the same time... I think things may have been a little crazy if they had been placed with me, boxes everywhere and three kids under 4!

There was mention of another possible placement next week - older siblings aged 9 and 7 - so I'm hoping things are about to happen. It's starting to look like I really am moving house for a reason...